Mad Woke Daily

In a story that hits like a dropkick from the top ropes, Linda McMahon, ex-WWE queen turned Trump’s Education Secretary, recently accepted the challenge from former First Lady, Jill Biden, self-proclaimed “doctor of education”, in a winner-take-all steel cage wrestling match with $1.6 trillion in the kitty. It’s not a bunch of smack-talk—it’s Monday Night Raw next month, where these two will brawl over the Ed Dept’s lost funding after Trump’s March 20th executive order gutted it completely.

The stakes? Simple. If Biden wins, the Department of Ed. get the funding back and remains federal; if not, education freedom and choice goes back to the states. Vince McMahon, smelling cash, set it up. “Linda slamming some wanna-be doctor? That’s money in the bank, baby!” he told us, grinning. “Fans will pay top dollar to see this ex-teacher-nerd get body-slammed.”

Scheduled for April 28, 2025, in Tampa, it’s already sold out—McMahon plans to call it the “Pay Per View Death of Woke Education.”

In a street interview we ran into Tom Russo, a 34-year-old WWE diehard rocking a replica championship belt “Yo, Linda’s gonna crush this chick!” he exclaimed, flexing. “Biden’s all ‘save the kids,’ but she don’t know a clothesline from a chalkboard. I’m betting my last Hot Pocket on a McMahon powerbomb. Raw’s back, baby!” His excitement was palpable, and the crowd’s eating it up.

We met with Linda during a training session, violently punching and kicking a heavy bag, she smirked to us: “Jill’s a paper-pusher who thinks DEI’s a finishing move. I’ll bury her and destroy that agency once and for all in one slam!”

We then caught up with Biden, clutching a Title IX playbook, she fired back: “Linda’s a relic. I’ll hit her with equity justice so hard she’ll fund pre-K from her own pocket.”

Conservatives can’t get enough of this bizarre spectacle: a flailing Ed Dept pinning its hopes on a wrestling ring just screams more government desperation.

McMahon’s biceps vs. Biden’s binders, and a whole lot of funding on the line. Is this the Ed Dept’s last gasp or just Vince’s latest grift? We will be there ringside. Stay tuned and stay woke.