Mad Woke Daily

Trump has unleashed another bombshell in response to France, refusing to ship back Lady Liberty and instead commanding a wild face-lift that morphs her into a bizarre tribute to Macron’s current wife/husband/brother/father… Depending on your perspective.

A storm has kicked up across the Atlantic as French politician Raphaël Glucksmann, a member of the European Parliament, stirred the pot last weekend, saying, “We’re going to say to the Americans who have chosen to side with the tyrants, to the Americans who fired researchers for demanding scientific freedom: ‘Give us back the Statue of Liberty.’ We gave it to you as a gift, but apparently you despise it. So, it will be just fine here at home.”

Trump was far from impressed and fired back, “I don’t want that ugly thing anyway; it looks like a giant tranny in a dress and sandals, total disaster!” Later that day, during a White House press conference, Trump boasted, “Hey France, how about this for a deal. Since the statue is a transgender, I’ve directed the National Park Service to reconstruct that man face into another man face…Brigitte Macron. Folks, we all know that is NOT a female. Is it a man?… E.T?… I don’t know, but what I do know is that this will be the best makeover ever!”

In a post on X today, Matt Walsh weighed in with his take, stating,

“I don’t want to give the Statue of Liberty to France but I do think we should remove that dumb poem about the ‘huddled masses’ and send that to them. They can attach it to the Eiffel Tower or something. America is not an international homeless shelter.— Matt Walsh (@MattWalshBlog) March 18, 2025.”

Inspired by Walsh’s idea, Trump decided to spice it up, ordering Army Engineers to permanently fix an iron “No Vacancy” sign over the old plaque. Trump exclaimed, “France can pout all they want, but I’m making Lady Liberty exclusive—America’s the best, folks, and we’re booked solid, no freeloaders allowed—tremendous!”

French President Emmanuel Macron, wrestling with the statue saga, stumbled through a Paris presser dripping with defeat. “Ever since Candace Owens outed the rumors that my wife might be my brother or father, life has been hard,” he pleaded desperately. “I’ll own it—Brigitte’s got a package that could capsize a cruise liner; all I ask for is the respect to allow me to openly love my gay father and or brother, only like a gay brother and or son could.” Trump, showing no remorse and doubling down, told reporters, “Macron can whine all he wants, but this is gonna be the greatest statue upgrade whether he likes it or not—Brigitte’s face, my genius, a tremendous win for America! May this statue be a reminder for us to always remember how gay France is.”

Diplomats are scratching their heads as the National Park Service preps for this face-lift, with some whispering it could strain U.S.-France ties more than a tariff tantrum. Mad Woke Daily can’t help but wonder if this ends with Lady Liberty sporting a mustache—or if Macron’s next move is to demand a refund on that 1886 gift.